6 Habits of Naturally Happy People

shutterstock_220193047Everyone has ‘one of those days!’

You know, when everything seems to go wrong.  No matter what you try to do to change your mood and get out of a funk, it just seems impossible.

The thing is, it is possible to limit those days to the bare minimum and take action to ensure that most of your days are full of happiness and contentment.

This is not down to luck, circumstances or anything else that is beyond your control.

Of course, things will conspire against you from time-to-time.  That’s just life!

But… and here’s the key…

You can follow 6 simple habits everyday that will make sure you deal with any setback and get your life back on track!

These 6 simple habits will allow you to remain firmly in the driving seat, create your own happy days and not allow circumstances to dictate your mood ever again.

1. Keep Cool

Let’s face it – life can make us mad!  It is very easy to feel frustrated, angry and resentful.  The first step to taking control and regaining happiness is to say calm and relaxed.  You can’t always control how other people behave, but you absolutely can control how you decide to respond.

Take a deep breath, walk away or just smile to yourself and think ‘I’m above this… I will not let this person or situation decide how I am going to feel’.

It’s not easy to start with, but over time you will find that you are able to take control and the best way to start is simple … just begin by noticing when you feel angry, resentful or frustrated.  Awareness if truly the first powerful step to self-control.

2. Switch Off

One of the biggest barriers to genuine happiness in the modern world is the constant bombardment of stimulation we face every day.  Everyone wants a piece of you!  From family and work commitments, keeping up with social media, television, hobbies, developing yourself and looking good, it’s like you are always ‘switched on’.

Everyone needs to learn when enough is enough.  A great strategy is to have times when you switch off all devices (TV, pc, laptop, tablet, phone etc) and just sit and breathe.  Maybe listen to some calming music and just focus on your breathing to regain some peace of mind and clarity.

It can be as simple as a ten minute walk in the open air where no one can contact you (phone off) and all you hear is your own footfall as you gently stroll along and let it all go.

3. Watch Your Words

This is a big one!  Try to catch your language and check whether you are being positive or not.  If you talk like the glass is half-full, then that’s what you will experience.  Many people have a ‘limited’ mindset where they see only problems and difficulties and what will go wrong.

‘Listen’ to what you think and say … are you expecting the worst?  Do you talk about things being huge difficulties or ‘nightmares’ or do you see them as challenges and opportunities?  The words you use (either in your own head or out loud) will shape how you perceive the world around you.

Choose a positive ‘growth’ mindset where you see the potential in everything and enjoy the playfulness in every challenge you encounter!

4. Visualise Success

Half the battle of being happy is imagining that it is possible to start with!

So many people just move from thing to another with no road map for a happy life.  If you have no destination in mind, then you’ll end up anywhere.  It is important to set clear goals and then imagine what it will feel like when you achieve them.

Not only does this program your mind for success, but you actually get greater motivation by being deeply inspired to go after you goals with real enthusiasm.  If you daydream and focus on what achieving your goals will feel like and mean to you, then you will totally ‘buy into’ them and you will be much more likely to follow through.

Not only that, but each time you focus on your dreams and imagine succeeding, you are mentally preparing yourself (as well as enjoying a reality ‘holiday’ that helps you rejuvenate as well as making  the dream seem completely real to you!)

5. Connect With Others

It can be lonely trying to make your way through life without a helping hand.  This is not about relying on others or refusing to take ownership.

The truth is, we all need to feel connected to others.  Whether that is a life partner, friends, family or your community, humans need to feel anchored in the safe harbor of someone else’s support and love.  It gives it all meaning, otherwise what is it all for?

Make sure you make time for people who inspire you and give you energy.  We all need friends who just know how to encourage us and pick us up when we feel down.  Spend time with these people and you will feel happier.

Just make sure you avoid the ‘negative ninnies’ in your life who drain you.  You know these people – they offer you nothing and drain the life and energy from the room.  Avoid them, cut them off and you will feel much better for it!

6. Be Playful

The last point is my favourite!  Sometimes we all act like life is some super-serious struggle.  It really doesn’t have to be like that.  We are meant to be light-hearted creatures who are creative, easy-going and fun to be with.

Keep asking yourself … why be glum?  What’s to worry about really? What great things are going to happen to me today?  Instead just think …

Get ready world, ’cause I’m coming NOW! I’m alive, the world is magical, now let’s dance!

Laugh in the rain, smile at the people you meet and skip along the road.  It’s all good, my friend!  We are alive and the world is our playground.  What shall we be today?

 

If you allow these 6 habits to become part of your day-to-day thinking, feeling and acting, then you will be naturally so much happier than you are now.  They are simple, but really powerful habits that can totally change you life and unlock your natural happiness.  So, start taking action today!

 

Are you ready to conquer stress?

Tuesday 13th October is the day I launch my new anti-stress program!

I’m very excited (as I’m sure you can tell!)

The thing is, it has taken me the best part of two months to pull this audio training together.  I’ve included everything I have learned so far in my journey to a healthier, happier and more authentic me.

It’s called… ICE My Stress (ICE is for Identify. Control. Eliminate.)

12064493_10156328361650019_578624193_n

That’s exactly what I believe you can do if you take action and follow some key principles and strategies.  I have been really delighted with the feedback I have had so far.

I promised ages ago that I would email my loyal followers and let them know that it is available and on sale. You can take a look at www.icemystress.com

Take a look soon and you will be able to get hold of this 3 part audio training program while it is at the lowest price it will be – just $7.

I am also including some help sheets and worksheets to make it even easier for you to get stress under control in your life.

This was absolutely the very first step I made when I decided to go on this journey to a better life and it a crucial way to begin to improve everything.

Once the cloud of stress is no longer hanging over you, then literally anything feels possible and your outlook becomes so much more positive.

I remember feeling so out of control, pressured and almost in despair when I was a busy school teacher, but I am so glad I learned these simple strategies s it has made all the difference.

I still have my moments, of course.  Who doesn’t? But the difference is that I know how to deal with my feelings and return to being calm and in control.

Anyway, this is not a hard sell.  If you think it might be of use then take a look, but it’s totally up to you.  I certainly don’t want to add to your stress!

Talk soon,

Tony

 

Mid Year Stock Take

I have been busy….but in a good way!

That’s why I haven’t posted anything in over two weeks.

I mentioned last time that I had had a kind of epiphany and understood exactly what I want to do now.

Well … that’s exactly what I have been working on.

In order to keep myself moving in a positive direction and continually ‘rebooting’ myself so that I am ‘upgraded’ and functioning as I want to …

I have decided to create some self-help programs that might help other people.

The first one will be released in early July and will be all about overcoming stress.

As you know, I’m not a self-help guru or anything.  I genuinely don’t want to be Tony Robbins or Brendon Burchard (as much as I admire both of them!)

I’m just an ordinary bloke who is trying to improve his own life.  Along the way, I think I’ve picked up a few things that might help others.

Particularly in the area of managing stress.

I’ve worked in education in the UK for the past 15 years and that certainly teaches you a thing or two about stress!

Here’s my thinking …

If I force myself to take a leap of faith and produce something that might help other people improve their lives then this should have three very positive outcomes:

1. I will get really clear on what is important in my own life

2. I can share my recent experiences as an ordinary person who has been through it

3. I can make a difference to other people and gain real meaning and purpose

That’s why I am willing to put in the time and effort to create something.

Of course, it’s going to involve some risk.

Firstly, there is the worry … ie: ‘who am I to do this?  Why would anyone listen to me?’

In the end, I have to believe that everyone has something to share.  And in all honesty, I’d rather listen to someone who is normal and will suggest realistic answers that will work in the real world, rather than some expert super-hero who is operating at a much higher level than everyone else.

Secondly, there is the very real worry that no one will be interested.

I’m less worried about that now.

The reason is that there are many people out there looking for solutions.  That’s why people read blogs … including this one.

I have already made a product in the past (Happy New You).  You may have bought it?

I made that just to pull together everything I had learned so far on my journey and I’m pleased that it has helped so many people. I also didn’t really believe it was possible to be able to sell your ideas like that.  But the feedback I have had has been very positive!

But now, I want to really work hard at providing specific solutions to specific problems!

I’m going to continue to use this blog to share everything I am working on in my life.

It really is a great place for me to explore my ideas and share them with a growing audience.  And I am so grateful for you continuing to read these posts!

As it is approaching the half-way point in the year, I thought this would be a good time to share with you what my aims are for the rest of 2015.

So, here is a kind of mid-year ‘stock take’.

 

Aims for the rest of 2015

1. Continue to focus on my health and get weight down to 12 stone

2. Study improvement and develop my motivation, energy, success and happiness

3. Create self-help products and build my business

 

I read recently that the human mind works best in 3s.  We can’t really remember much more than that.  So my 3 are health, improvement, business.

At the end of the year, I am going to see exactly how far I have come in those 3 areas.

I’d love to hear what the 3 key areas you are going to work on and achieve massive improvement in by the end of 2015. Please comment below.

 

Cheers for now,

Tony

Things are changing … and that’s okay


This last week I have learned a huge amount!

Last weekend I went to a marketing mastermind event in the UK.  It was a great experience.  I learned a huge amount, met some great people and now feel energized about the future.

The whole experience has enabled me to be really clear about:

– what I want

– how I’m going to get it

The thing is, I thought it was just going to be about business.  I didn’t expect it to help me be clearer about the whole of my life.

I’m writing this blog because it is helping me document my journey towards a healthy, happy and more authentic me.

But I always had another aim.  I thought it would be great if I were able to turn my own journey into something that would inspire other people.

It seems to me that we all look for meaning in life – and I have found none better than helping others.  It’s the thing that gives me the biggest buzz.

So…back to the marketing event.

How is that going to help?

Well, in a nut shell, it’s all about getting my message out there to as many people as possible.

I have tons of ideas spinning around my head at the moment, all about how I can share my experiences and beliefs on self-development.

I’m going to share these ideas here with you first.

This next week or so, I am going to be throwing myself fully into this and I hope to be back here afterwards, ready to share my new project with you.

 

So…what is the point of this post???Change Bowling Ball Strike Shaking Up for Adapting

I am changing…

and, actually…

so are you.

 

 

 

We are all changing all the time.  As Tony Robbins says “Change is automatic, but progress requires effort”.

I now FULLY understand what he is saying.

We will naturally change (get older, grow up, put on weight, lose strength etc) and this will happen without any input from us, but we can make progress by taking action and fighting against these natural events.

I feel like I am changing as a person.

I genuinely never would have thought that I had anything worth sharing with others.

But the truth is… we all have!  EVERY one of us!

That’s how I’ve changed.

Better than losing weight, being positive and figuring out who I am (and those things are great!) …

… is the understanding that I am worthwhile.  That I have things to share …

… that will help people!

… And SO DO YOU!!

 

This is a shorter post today, because I’m super-excited about the main idea I have to help lots of people.  But I promise to share it with you first!

I’m really interested to know what things you would like to share with world and what is stopping you.  Please comment below and let’s help each other!

Cheers for now,

Tony

The Mediocrity Trap

Customer service evaluation form with tick on averageA friend asked me a difficult question the other day: “Why aren’t you satisfied with what you’ve got?”

Here’s my answer.

I would like more in my life, not because I am ungrateful and selfish, but because I want to be the very best version of myself that I can.

Then I will be able to help more people and make a difference.  That’s not selfish is it?

But it occurs to me that the reason my friend asked the question is because we have been brain-washed into thinking that if we strive too much then we must be selfish and ungrateful.

I’m sure it starts at school.  We are all encouraged to do well, up to a point.  It’s okay to be ‘quite bright’ as long as you don’t make everyone else feel bad by really succeeding.

That’s why we end up in…

The Mediocrity Trap

This is where you are doing ‘okay’ and really don’t have any reason to moan, but you are hardly living a truly passionate and purposeful life where you feel you are really making a difference.  You are doing…(dreadful word)…FINE.

To me, this is a state that we have to really guard against.

Surely life is about being excited and energised and challenged to be the very best we can, not an ‘okay-ish’, mediocre, reasonable existence.

So I make no apology for striving and wanting to change.  I know that I will make my own life better and everyone else’s life too.  I was meant to shine…

…we all were!  So let’s do it!

Tony Robbins says that if you are excited or scared, then you can change, but you need to worry about being okay.

The other thing to beware of is when you start seeing others as being grasping or careerist maniacs on a mission.  If you think they are trampling over you to get where they want, it may actually be that you are standing still and they are just going past you.  You aren’t in their way, they have just moved forward in their life and you have stayed exactly where you were.

And that’s not their fault is it?

This is why we have to guard against being average.  We are worth more than that.

I know, by definition, not everyone can be above average.  But you are already better than most people because you are unusual enough to care about creating a compelling and wonderful future and taking consistent action to make sure it happens.

Have you noticed that children rarely talk about things being quite good?  To them, everything is ‘Amazing!’ or ‘Rubbish!’  We need to start seeing things with greater clarity and emotional significance and stop wallowing in a grey puddle of mediocre sludge.

NLP To The Rescue!

Luckily, we have Neuro Linguistic Programming to help us.  All you need to do is keep a careful look out for average thoughts and average words.  Try to be aware of moments when you are settling for ‘okay’ and using language that limits you to a ‘satisfactory’ life.

For the next few days, listen to the words other people use and see how limited their expectations are.  Most people are now acting in a defensive mode where they see the world as a scary place and life as a struggle where they can lose what they have.

It’s much better to live like you see life as a game where you have nothing to lose but everything to gain as you aim for an extraordinary life!

You can be playful and committed to achieving goals.  They are not mutually exclusive.

The thing about seeing life is a game is that, just like in chess for example, if you are not doing well, you can reset the board and start again.  You can learn the rules and study strategies to get better.

That’s got to be a much better way to see life than a constant unending struggle where you are always in danger of being crushed.

Switch how you see the world, and life becomes lighter and more full of possibilities instantly!

Back to Gratitude

The reason that I know that I am not selfish and ungrateful is because I have actually started making gratitude a conscious willed choice that I make.

I spend time every day mentally listing all the things that I am grateful for – the skills, experiences, friends, family, hopes, challenges and resources I have that make me feel truly alive.

So I know that I am very thankful for all I have and will be more grateful than most people for the future successes I hope to enjoy.

I would love to hear how you try to avoid the Mediocrity Trap in your life.  What do you do to avoid being distracted by the average herd?  How do you keep true to your mission?  Please comment and let me know.