Please hear me out. ‘Cause it makes me feel like she does ==============>
You see, I think that there is a whole army of self-obsessed, patronising and pretty horrible people out there who don’t care about you, your problems or how you can solve them. They just pretend they do.
They only care about selling you some false hope, just enough to keep you hooked as a Self-Improvement Junkie. They only want you to keep coming back for more, more, more!
On the other hand, I honestly do believe that there are genuine, real and positive people out there who are motivated by helping you to be your best. There are some awesome people in the self-development world and they make it all feel worthwhile.
People like Brendon Burchard, Tony Robbins and Danielle Laporte are truly inspirational, but I think that’s because they are into Self-Improvement FIRST and are marketers SECOND. And that’s the way it should be, if you ask me.
I have no problem at all with someone who is genuine, real and has knowledge and wisdom to share, doing just that. I know that they will need to hype up their products and services a little to get our attention. That’s absolutely fine. It’s when you know you are just getting some empty platitudes wrapped in some marketing BS hype that I start to get cross!
(I know I should accept the things I can’t change with grace, but honestly…ARGHHH!)
I hope that you don’t see this as just someone whining in a negative way (If you do, then see point 2 below). I really am pushing myself forward in my life and taking action, but some of the crap I’ve seen out there just makes me MAD!!
(Although I do try to rise above it all and remain calm and serene )
So…here are my Top Five Self-Improvement BS Detectors!
Keep your nose primed to sniff these out, and uncover their horrible stench before they sap your positivity.
1. It’s All Your Fault
This is a classic. I’m all for people taking responsibility for their lives and owning their own mistakes as well as their success (or lack of it). That’s a really powerful way to take-back the sense of power that so many people have lost in their life. You can then start taking purposeful action to achieve your OWN goals. That’s just dandy!
But…when you have tried everything that the self-appointed Self-Improvement Guru suggests and none of it has worked, then is it really your fault? It is quite convenient that some Self-Improvement programs come with in-built terms and conditions which basically say; “If you use our product and it doesn’t work, then it’s your own lack of positivity that caused it to fail, despite ‘developing your positivity’ being one of the things we sold you.”
2. You Just Need To Be Positive
This one is definitely linked to the first. If only you are positive enough then you will make huge progress! Again, I have no problem with the power of positive thinking and I agree that upward spirals of positive thinking, leading to positive action, leading to more positive thinking etc can really work.
But…if a Self-Improvement Guru tells you that it is just down to positive thinking and nothing else then you should just laugh and find another mentor. That is complete crap! If wishes alone were enough, then I would look like George Clooney.
Positive thinking and creating your dream life will only take you half way. It will give you clarity and vision, but it won’t manifest what you want into the world. You also need to take CONSISTENT ACTION to actually achieve your goals. Even then, you are limited to some extent by nature, however hard you try. That is not simply a ‘limiting belief’, but just a recognition of reality. Sure, you can develop much further than you ever thought possible, but there are limits. Don’t fall for the easy ‘think your way to _____’ BS!
3. How To Get A Job By Mr. Unemployed
One of most annoying things is being told how to do something by someone who hasn’t done it themselves. ‘How to Get Rich’ by A. Bum etc. If someone hasn’t had results doing the thing they are selling, then what makes you think that you will? This is another example of someone understanding the marketing ‘trigger’ words to get you to buy, but having no real understanding or interest in the product they are trying to sell you.
Quite simply, you need to see their results and know that they actually understand and really care about what they are talking about. And quite a few of them don’t!
4. Total Ecstasy in 1 Minute
Another BS marketing approach that some so-called experts take. They promise to take the thing that you have struggled with for all these years (weight loss, motivation, career success, financial freedom or whatever) and show you how to succeed to the max in a ridiculously short time.
Wow! They must really know what it takes to be able to sort my life out that quickly, without any effort and in no time at all! Or…are they just selling me an easy, no-effort-required dream that will make me feel warm and fluffy with excitement as I hand over my money, but leave me empty, cheated and $50 poorer?
The reality is that any real change takes effort, commitment and determination and there are very few Super-Fast Success Short Cuts at a special introductory price that will ‘turn your life around’.
5. You Need Me To Tell You To Think For Yourself
The last way to tell if you are being fed some Self-Improvement BS is to look at how you are being coached. Often the Self-Improvement Guru will tell you that YOU must think for yourself and start to take responsibility (See Point 1). At the same time, they will also say that only THEY can help you to solve your problems.
So, who should you listen to? Yourself? (because you are taking responsibility and ownership of you own development) or the Guru? (who knows exactly what you need to do – including taking responsibility for yourself)
Ouuuccchhhh! My head hurts now!
Okay…I do realise that it is possible to understand that someone else might need to advise you to think for yourself. It’s just an example of the kind of deliberate ‘mystical’ uncertainty that some of these Gurus use to keep us confused.
Why would they do that?
So you accept their authority without question and continue buying their products? Could be!
Now, as I said earlier, there are many genuinely inspiring Self-Improvement coaches and mentors out there and I really don’t think that all Self-Improvement is BS. But, hopefully you will agree with me that some of it is.
Keep an eye out (or a nose, I suppose?!) for the BS Detectors above and just stick to the good stuff!
Or buy my “How to spot Self-Improvement BS and Feel Like a God in 5 Seconds” Mega-Course which is available for a limited time only for $10,000 😉
Cheers for now,
Please comment on your own experience of Self-Improvement BS and share this article on social media.
I’d LOVE to hear what you think! Thanks
(Even if you just think that there’s nothing we can do about it…but that’ll just be your negativity talking 😉 )